Here are some of the responses of women who have completed the Helping Women Recover program.
It was a really great experience. I got to share things that I thought I wouldn't tell another person. —Yvette S.
I feel it helped me open up and see a lot of inner feelings I had hidden deep within me. It also showed me that I'm not the only one with bad past experiences and now they don't seem so bad. —Lisa
Great. I feel like I've really learned a lot about myself and my past and that it can't hold me back if I don't let it. —Anonymous
I feel this is a very uplifting experience. I haven't ever experienced anything like this. This is a great opportunity to learn more about being a woman in recovery. Thank you. —Anonymous
I had an entertaining journey. It made me understand myself better, like where I'm at in my program of N.A. and how I see myself not only on the outside but deep within on the inside. There are things I need to work on but I know I'm going to be okay because I can and will recover. Making recovery a part of my life—one day at time. —Anonymous
My experience has been incredible. I feel whole again. Helping Women Recover helped me so much and it gave me a better understanding of myself. —Z. M.
This program helped me to transfer the changes I am making and experiencing from the hands-on to writing them down so I could look at them on paper, reflect on them and share them with other women. —Amy
My experience with this book and this group has been very painful. It brought a lot of anger and pain, perhaps even grief. But it has been worth it. I've never valued myself as a woman. But now I can—truly awesome discovery. —Anonymous
I discovered that I had issues that I need to address that I left behind and wanted to just ignore them, and so I did, because I was in fear of walking through them. It was brought to my attention that I have a grand opportunity to deal with my issues here in a safe place with people to help me. I never looked at it that way. —Joann W.
I found it very helpful in my journey of recovery. I also became a lot closer with the other women in my group. I came to believe that I am a kind and beautiful woman. I know now that I have the power of choice. —Londa H.
Although some of the discussions were a little bit uncomfortable for me, it was very helpful and gave me a lot of insight about myself. I enjoyed groups and the homework. I think the book is great and plan to keep it forever. —Anonymous
This edition first published 2019
© 2019 Stephanie S. Covington
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Edition History
Stephanie S. Covington (1e, 1999), Stephanie S. Covington (2e, 2008)
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Stephanie S. Covington, Ph.D., LCSW, is an internationally recognized clinician, author, organizational consultant, and lecturer and a pioneer in the field of women's issues, trauma, addiction, and recovery. With more than thirty years of experience, she has developed an innovative, gender-responsive, and trauma-informed approach that results in effective services in public, private, and institutional settings. Her clients include the Betty Ford Treatment Center, the Center for Substance Abuse Treatment in Washington, D.C., the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation, the Correctional Service of Canada, the Ministries of Justice in England, Scotland and Switzerland, and numerous other treatment and correctional settings. She is the featured therapist on the Oprah Winfrey Network TV show Breaking Down the Bars and the co-author of a three-year research project, Gender-Responsive Strategies: Research, Practice, and Guiding Principles for Women Offenders, for the National Institute of Corrections. She also has served as a consultant to the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC) and was selected for the federal Advisory Committee for Women's Services.
Educated at Columbia University and the Union Institute, Dr. Covington has conducted seminars for behavioral health professionals, community organizations, criminal justice professionals, and recovery groups in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, Mexico, Europe, Africa, Iceland, Brazil, and New Zealand. She has served on the faculties of the University of Southern California, San Diego State University, and the California School of Professional Psychology. She has published extensively, including ten gender-responsive, trauma-informed treatment curricula. Dr. Covington is a board-certified Diplomate of the National Association of Social Workers and the American Board of Sexology and is a member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy and the American Psychological Association. She is based in La Jolla, California, where she is co-director of both the Institute for Relational Development and the Center for Gender & Justice.
Awakening Your Sexuality: A Guide for Recovering Women
Beyond Anger and Violence: A Program for Women (facilitator guide, participant workbook, and DVD)
Beyond Trauma: A Healing Journey for Women (facilitator guide, participant workbook, and DVDs)
Beyond Violence: A Prevention Program for Criminal Justice–Involved Women (facilitator guide, participant workbook, and DVD)
Exploring Trauma: A Brief Intervention for Men with Roberto A. Rodriguez (facilitator guide, participant workbook, and CD ROM)
Healing Trauma: A Brief Intervention for Women with Eileen Russo (facilitator guide, participant workbook, and CD Rom)
Helping Men Recover: A Program for Treating Addiction with Dan Griffin and Rick Dauer (facilitator guide and participant workbook)
Helping Men Recover: A Program for Treating Addiction, Special Edition for Use in the Criminal Justice System, with Dan Griffin and Rick Dauer (facilitator guide and participant workbook)
Helping Women Recover: A Program for Treating Addiction (facilitator guide and participant journal)
Helping Women Recover: A Program for Treating Addiction, Special Edition for Use in the Criminal Justice System (facilitator guide and participant journal)
Leaving the Enchanted Forest: The Path from Relationship Addiction to Intimacy with Liana Beckett
Moving from Trauma-Informed to Gender-Responsive: A Training Program for Organizational Change with Sandra L. Bloom (facilitator guide, video, and USB drive with handouts)
Voices: A Program of Self-Discovery and Empowerment for Girls with Kimberley Covington and Madeline Covington (facilitator guide and interactive journal)
A Woman’s Way through the Twelve Steps (published in Spanish as La mujer y su practica de los Doce Pasos)
A Woman’s Way through the Twelve Steps Program DVD
A Woman’s Way through the Twelve Steps Facilitator Guide
A Woman’s Way through the Twelve Steps Workbook (published in Spanish as La mujer y su practica de los Doce Pasos: Libro de ejercicios)
Women and Addiction: A Gender-Responsive Approach (manual, DVD, and CE test)
Women in Recovery: Understanding Addiction (published in Spanish as Mujeres en recuperación: Entendiendo la adicción)
For more information on Dr. Covington’s work, visit: www.stephaniecovington.com and www.centerforgenderandjustice.org.
I chose a lotus flower for the cover of Helping Women Recover because the lotus can be a meaningful symbol for women's recovery. Although it grows with its roots deep in the mud, the lotus rises from the muddy waters and emerges pure and unblemished. It unfolds gradually, one petal at a time, to blossom in the sunlight. The mud can symbolize murky beginnings or the darkness of addiction. The water can symbolize experience and a transition to healing and recovery. The lotus can symbolize the purity of the soul, rebirth, spiritual awakening, and enlightenment. For thousands of years, the lotus has been associated with profound change.
I see the lotus as the symbol of a woman's healing and recovery. Making the shift from addiction to recovery is a transformational experience. When a woman makes this shift, she is able to say, “Who I am today is not who I was.” The elegant and beautiful lotus flower that emerges from the mud is the beautiful woman within.
For over thirty years, I have been helping women who are trying to recover from addiction. In that time, we have learned a great deal about how women grow and develop and about the unique needs of women in recovery. I have incorporated that knowledge into this program. Although the program is designed for women with harmful use of alcohol and other drugs, much of the material can be helpful to any woman. This program is now being used in mental health clinics, eating disorder programs, and domestic violence shelters, as well as in substance use disorder treatment programs in many jails and prisons.
Helping Women Recover addresses issues that many women struggle with, especially if they are addicted to alcohol or other drugs. Each woman's path of healing is unique, but most of us find that it involves discovering our true selves, connecting in healthy relationships with others, understanding our sexuality, and gaining some spiritual connection. Recovery is like a spiral upward, away from a life that revolves around the objects of addiction (alcohol or other drugs, food, sex, and so forth) and outward into ever-widening circles of freedom, self-knowledge, and connection with others.
Although you may use this program by yourself or one-on-one with a counselor, in most cases you will be meeting with a group of other recovering women who will be traveling companions on your journey. You will attend twenty meetings with the other members of your group. With them, you will have new experiences and learn new ways of looking at the world. Your group will be led by a group facilitator, a woman who has experience with the journey of recovery. She will serve as your tour guide. She will offer you insights and suggestions about the thoughts and feelings that you may experience on your journey.
The program is organized into four modules, or sections: Self, Relationships, Sexuality, and Spirituality. These are the four areas that women identify as the triggers for relapse and the areas of greatest change in their recoveries. Within the four modules, specific topics are covered, including: addiction, self-esteem, sexism and power, family roles, relationships, interpersonal violence and abuse, trauma, recovery, sexuality, and spirituality.
Awareness is the first step toward change. When you become aware of your addiction, you can decide to begin recovery. When you become more aware of yourself and your relationships, you can make changes in your life. So the journey is about discovery as well as recovery. Healing takes place when you think and act differently, connecting with all parts of yourself—your inner self, your outer self, your sexual self, and your spiritual self.
A journal is a book for recording the experiences of a journey. Using this journal will help you to reflect on and record what you learn, think, and feel as you travel the road to recovery with a group or on your own. This journal contains:
Space is provided in this journal for you to make notes about what you are thinking and feeling and what you discover about yourself and life as you go through this program. Recording your insights will help you to become aware and stay aware of them. Sometimes you will use this journal to make notes during group sessions. In addition, this journal contains illustrations and diagrams that will be discussed during the sessions. It also includes a summary of the material covered in each session. The summaries and your notes will help you to remember what you discussed. If you cannot remember what a diagram or something in the summary means, you can ask about it at the next group session.
Finally, this journal contains questions for you to answer and activities for you to complete at the end of each session or, if possible, between sessions. You will spend some time individually recording your thoughts and completing the brief activities. These activities are not work that you have to do in order to pass a class. There are no right or wrong answers, no “shoulds” or “oughts,” and your reflections and responses will not be checked or graded. You do not need to worry about your handwriting or spelling. This journal is for you—a tool to help you with your own growth and recovery.
Many women have completed this program more than once, and they use different colored ink to do the activities each time. They find that they can see their own progress and development this way. The journal then becomes a record of their recovery. So even if you have used your journal in a group setting, you may want to go back through later on your own.
You probably can do any of the between-sessions activities or exercises in a half hour, but it is fine if you also want to make notes or just review your progress. You probably will have insights into areas you haven't thought much about before. If you like to draw, feel free to draw your responses instead of, or in addition to, using words.
I hope that this journal becomes a personal record of your recovery, one that you will treasure years from now, when you can look back to your time in the group and be proud of what you have accomplished. The reason for the creation of this program is my desire to see women like you recover and heal in a nurturing and supportive environment.
This program is a beginning for you—the beginning of your healing and recovery. It will take time for you to deal with the trauma of your past and to integrate what you are learning. It takes time to learn, to recover, to change, and to move on. When you have completed this program, you will see that it is just the beginning of a new life, one that includes ongoing recovery and ongoing learning about who you are, what you want, and what you can do.
Best wishes,
La Jolla, California
May 2019