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Copyright © 2020 by the American Counseling Association. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. Except as permitted under the United States Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
American Counseling Association
6101 Stevenson Avenue, Suite 600 • Alexandria, VA 22304
Associate Publisher • Carolyn C. Baker
Digital and Print Development Editor • Nancy Driver
Senior Production Manager • Bonny E. Gaston
Copy Editor • Kay Mikel
Cover and text design by Bonny E. Gaston.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Corey, Gerald, author.
Title: Personal reflections on counseling / Gerald Corey.
Description: Alexandria, VA : American Counseling Association, [2020] | Includes bibliographical references.
Identifiers: LCCN 2019056240 | ISBN 9781556203954 (paperback)
Subjects: LCSH: Counseling—Vocational guidance. | Counseling psychology—Vocational guidance.
Classification: LCC BF636.64 .C673 2020 | DDC 158.3—dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019056240
To students and new professionals,
may you be inspired to create and follow
your own personal and professional paths.
For many years, I have been giving presentations at American Counseling Association conferences, including a program titled “Becoming a Professional Counselor: For Graduate Students and New Professionals.” The attendees ask many questions about navigating a counseling career and balancing their personal life with a professional life. I decided to write this book to reach out to a larger audience beyond these annual meetings. In preparation for writing this book, I asked a number of my colleagues and students to provide questions for my consideration, and I added questions I wanted to address as well. Many of the topics will be familiar and appear in books I have authored or coauthored, but the thematic context is unique and addresses a broad range of issues. I hope this book will be an inspiration to counselors who are just beginning their personal and professional journey.
In Personal Reflections on Counseling, I share my insights and the lessons I have learned over my 60-year career in the counseling profession. I engage in considerable self-disclosure on a wide variety of topics, and I hope this will encourage readers to engage in an active process of self-reflection that is useful both personally and professionally. As I was writing, I imagined myself talking with my students, and I strived to be concise, practical, and personal. I view this book as a mentoring endeavor, providing suggestions, recommendations, and advice on a wide range of subjects.
Topics addressed include creating your professional path, mentoring and being a mentee, surviving graduate school and beyond, reviewing changes in the counseling profession, benefiting from your personal therapy, focusing on self-care and wellness, becoming an ethical counselor, managing value conflicts in counseling, using self-disclosure therapeutically, dealing with difficult clients, getting the most out of supervision, and becoming a writer. At the end of each chapter, Reflection Questions ask you to engage in thinking about and applying these topics to yourself.
This book is a valuable supplement for a variety of courses in counseling, counselor education, human services, psychology, and social work; and its candid prose will delight students taking an introduction to the counseling profession, practicum, or internship course. I expect the book to have special relevance for graduate students (on both the master’s and doctoral levels) and new professionals.
I greatly appreciate the constructive feedback I received from colleagues and former students who reviewed the manuscript and encouraged me to keep this book personal and inspirational. Marianne Schneider Corey, my wife and colleague, did an amazing job of keeping me on track, keeping me honest, and suggesting ways to introduce personal experiences in a relevant and effective manner. We had many productive discussions throughout this project, and her insights have added depth to the answers explored in the book. Others who reviewed the manuscript, suggested additional ideas, and offered valuable input to enhance the discussion are:
Special appreciation goes to Carolyn Baker, the associate publisher at the American Counseling Association. Carolyn contributed her expertise by reviewing the manuscript, providing helpful comments and suggestions for consistency in style, and offering support throughout the writing and revision process. A special thank you goes to our manuscript editor Kay Mikel, whose editorial talents ensured a personal and practical presentation. Producing a book is truly a team effort, and both Carolyn and Kay, along with all of the reviewers, are key people on this team, and I thank them one and all.
Gerald Corey, EdD, ABPP, is professor emeritus of human services and counseling at California State University at Fullerton. He received his doctorate in counseling in 1967 from the University of Southern California. He was awarded an honorary doctorate in Humane Letters in 1992 from National Louis University. He is a Diplomate in Counseling Psychology, American Board of Professional Psychology; a licensed psychologist in California; and a National Certified Counselor. He is a Fellow of the American Psychological Association (Division 17, Counseling Psychology; and Division 49, Group Psychotherapy); a Fellow of the American Counseling Association; and a Fellow of the Association for Specialists in Group Work. In addition to these organizations, he holds memberships in the American Group Psychotherapy Association, the Association for Counselor Education and Supervision, the Western Association of Counselor Education and Supervision, and the National Organization for Human Services. He received the Lifetime Achievement Award from the American Mental Health Counselors Association in 2011, the Eminent Career Award from Association for Specialists in Group Work in 2001, and the Outstanding Professor of the Year Award from California State University at Fullerton in 1991. He teaches courses in theories of counseling, group counseling, and ethics in counseling. He is the author or coauthor of 16 textbooks in counseling currently in print, along with more than 70 journal articles and numerous book chapters. His book Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy has been translated into Arabic, Indonesian, Portuguese, Turkish, Korean, and Chinese. Theory and Practice of Group Counseling has been translated into Korean, Chinese, Spanish, and Russian. Issues and Ethics in the Helping Professions has been translated into Korean, Japanese, and Chinese. With his colleagues, he has conducted workshops in the United States, Germany, Ireland, Belgium, Scotland, Mexico, Canada, China, and Korea—with a special focus on training participants in group counseling. He has presented workshops for professional organizations and special intensive courses at various universities.
The following seven Corey books are published by the American Counseling Association:
Recent publications by Gerald Corey and colleagues with Cengage Learning include:
Gerald Corey has also made several educational DVD programs on various aspects of counseling practice: (1) Individual counseling video to accompany Counseling Gwen From Various Perspectives (2021); (2) Group video to accompany Theory and Practice of Group Counseling (2019); (3) Ethics in Action: DVD and Workbook (2015, with Marianne Schneider Corey and Robert Haynes); (4) Groups in Action: Evolution and Challenges DVD and Workbook (2014, with Marianne Schneider Corey and Robert Haynes); (5) DVD for Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy: The Case of Stan and Lecturettes (2013); (6) DVD for Integrative Counseling: The Case of Ruth and Lecturettes (2013, with Robert Haynes); and (7) DVD lecturettes to accompany Theory and Practice of Group Counseling (2012). All of these video programs are available through Cengage Learning.
Choosing a career in counseling is more complex than simply deciding that you want to help others. In your graduate program interview, you may be asked, “Why do you want to become a counselor?” Your answer to this question may reveal both your motivations and how your personal needs may influence your work as a counseling professional. As you begin to create your professional path, reflect on these questions:
If you understand your motivations for being in a counseling program, you will have a good chance of meeting the goals you set for yourself as a professional.
When I first decided to become a teacher, my conscious motivation was to help others. Eventually I realized that multiple motives were operating in my career choice. Initially I was not aware of what I would be getting from helping others. Later in my career, becoming a counseling psychologist and a counselor educator met my need for being able to make a difference in the lives of students, and this is a basic motivation that energizes me today.
Although you may have altruistic reasons for choosing your professional path, it is important to recognize what you are getting from helping others. Go deeper than simply saying you get satisfaction or a good feeling from helping others. Your desire to become a counselor might include the need to make an impact on others, to give back to society what you have been given, to understand yourself more fully or to resolve personal issues, to feel the appreciation associated with being needed, to study and understand what drives human behavior and behavioral change, or to develop answers to problems and find solutions that help others. Your professional endeavors should be satisfying. If some of your own needs are not met through your work, you may lose interest in what you are doing. Several needs and motivations may be operating at the same time, and your reasons for continuing on this path may evolve and strengthen throughout your career.
If you find meeting your clients’ needs satisfying, you are more likely to create a rewarding career for yourself. But it is important to understand whose personal needs are being met through your work. Meeting your personal needs at the expense of your clients’ needs is unethical. For example, if you push your agenda over that of your client because you need to see your client make behavioral changes, you are failing your client. If you have a strong need to be appreciated and praised, you may seek positive feedback from your client instead of focusing on your client’s needs. Your professional path will be built based on many choices you make early in your career.
• • •
Reflect on what you would most like from your career, and follow your interests. If you let yourself dream about an ideal profession, what does your dream tell you? Be guided by what you most want in life, not by what you think other people want for you. Creating a career is a continuing decision-making process; it is not a single event. If you let yourself envision what you most want from your career, and if you work to achieve your goals, your accomplishments may exceed your wildest dreams. Mentors and supervisors can provide resources to help you make career choices and point out directions for you to consider. Reflect on this input as you decide what will work best for you. Instead of selecting one occupation that will last a lifetime, choose a broad field of endeavor that appeals to you, and remain open to taking action on opportunities that come your way.
My career path has not proceeded in a straight line; it has been marked by many twists and turns. I began by learning about counseling in general, and then I narrowed my focus as I took other turns on my professional journey. I have found ways to maintain interest in the many aspects of my work, especially through teaching, writing, and making educational videos. Teaching has always been my primary area of interest, and from this general area I eventually developed specialized interests in counselor education, ethics in counseling practice, theory and practice of counseling and psychotherapy, and group work. Following my interests and doing what seemed most personally meaningful has been my best guide in charting my professional course.
Becoming the professional you aspire to be is a process that will evolve and change over time. Here are some ideas for you to consider as you actively create your personal and professional journey:
As you review these ideas, which seem most helpful to you? Which suggestions would be most difficult for you to put into action? Which ideas are you willing to put into action right away?
One of my former students pursued a social work career, and I recently received an email from him telling me that he had accepted my challenge to take risks and how following this advice has been central in creating his professional journey. Here is part of what he shared with me.
Recently an opportunity presented itself and I went for it. The Directorship for the Mental Health Department of an urban school district became available, I applied, and I got the position. The department consists of a large workforce of school-based mental health providers (mainly LCSWs and a few psychiatrists). There are moments when the weight of the job wakes me up in the middle of the night. However, there are more moments (at least right now) where I find the inspiration and drive to positively impact the social-emotional and mental well-being of all the students enrolled in this district . . . that’s not even counting their parents/caregivers and staff!
You have been in my thoughts recently. I hope all is well with you. I want you to know that I often think back on how you challenged me and how by leaning into those challenges I am the person that I am now. Thank you!
For a personal presentation on beginning your professional path, see Surviving and Thriving in Your Counseling Program (Austin & Austin, 2020).
Inspiring others has been a motivating force throughout my entire career. It gives me immense satisfaction to be a source of encouragement to my students, to provide support, and to nudge them into finding and following their passions. Providing service to others is not a completely altruistic endeavor; I am well aware of the personal satisfaction I derive from being in a position to make a difference in the lives of students and mentees. I appreciate my students’ deep commitments to social justice work and to doing what they can to better their community and the world. Although this may seem ambitious and unrealistic, I am convinced that we can bring about change in the world through our desire to give back to others what we have been given. We each have unique talents, and putting these talents into action is a vital part of striving toward self-actualization.
Making small ripples has a cumulative impact that expands your influence. Many of you may have initially gravitated toward the counseling profession because of the profound impact teachers, counselors, and family members had on you, and now you want to pay it forward. Even as graduate students, many of you have already derived satisfaction and fulfillment from assisting people in navigating their struggles. Caring about others is certainly a worthy ideal, and it is essential to take care of yourself so you can sustain your efforts in providing service to others.
One thing that gets in the way of the effectiveness of new professionals is trying too hard and expecting to be perfect in whatever they do. When beginning to see clients in a graduate program, students often focus on what technique to use, what to say next, and how they are being perceived by the client. It is difficult to be present with an individual client when your mind is distracted in this way. Work to put these thoughts aside and concentrate on listening to the person before you. Our task is to listen carefully and deeply to our clients and to let them lead the way. If we are able to even minimally enter the world of our clients, we increase our chances of being present for them. Counselors are not solely responsible for the outcomes of therapy. By enlisting our clients as collaborative partners in the therapeutic work, we can put more emphasis on what is happening for our clients in the present moment and use this as a guide to exploration in a session.
Without a doubt, taking the initiative to network with my peers, professors, and colleagues was a key factor in establishing my own career. I have been a member of organizations such as the American Counseling Association, the American Psychological Association, the National Organization for Human Services, the Association for Counselor Education and Supervision, and regional organizations for many years. I regularly attend these professional conferences and greatly enjoy and profit from attending and presenting programs with colleagues. Even at this late stage in my career, I am committed to being active in professional organizations, and I encourage you to join the professional organizations that most align with your interests.
If your area of interest is counselor education and supervision, I recommend attending the Association for Counselor Education and Supervision conferences and submitting proposals to present a program at their national or regional conferences. Becoming a member of the American Counseling Association and attending their annual conferences can provide you with rewarding experiences. Attending these conferences is a great way to make connections with people who share your interests in counselor education and supervision. Being active in a professional organization will help you stay current in your field, increase the scope of your network of colleagues, and discover available positions in your field. Schedule some time with your professors and ask them how you can get established in a career in academia. You do not have to carve out your professional career on your own, and reaching out to those who can mentor you is one way to learn about key opportunities.
I have never been overly worried about getting tenure. In fact, I left several secure teaching positions for new positions that promised to lead to professional advancement. In my last position at California State University at Fullerton, I navigated the process that led to tenure and being promoted to full professor. I was guided by my professional interests, which involved a great deal of time and effort teaching and writing textbooks. Teaching and writing have been intertwined for me. I see writing as a forum for teaching, and I have written books for the courses I taught. My work as an educator enhanced my writing, and my writing was a productive resource for preparing for classes. I greatly enjoyed teaching and met with considerable success in this realm. I had high standards for my students, and even though my classes were demanding and challenging, my student evaluations were consistently positive.
When I was engaged in the tenure and promotion process, a number of criteria were deciding factors in achieving these academic mileposts: research and scholarly activities, teaching performance, publications in journals and books, service to the community and the university, and professional activities. Today many universities emphasize scholarly work and professional publications in refereed journals. When it came to advancement in the university, I was given credit for writing textbooks as a key part of scholarly activity. I was not unaware or unconcerned about meeting the research expectations of my department and the university, but my major efforts went toward doing what I loved and what was meaningful to me. The “publish or perish” pressure did not dictate my activities as a university professor. Fortunately, following this path led to tenure, promotion, and several prestigious awards based on professional achievements.
If you are a new counselor educator, I strongly recommend that you investigate the mission and goals of the university program to which you are applying and consider what will be required of you to gain tenure and advance in professional rank. Ask your colleagues who have successfully navigated the tenure/promotion process for suggestions on how you can navigate this process. You are not alone in this demanding process, and reaching out to others can be instrumental in attaining your goals. Some universities are known to have research-based programs that emphasize publishing articles in peer-reviewed journals more than writing textbooks or excelling in teaching. This may not fit your professional interests, and you may be very unhappy in your university position even though you become tenured and are promoted.