Rik Rushton is an international speaker, life coach and high-performance sports coach who works with individuals, corporations and multinational companies, sharing his success drivers with audiences across Australasia and around the globe.

Rik is a recognised authority on communication, relation-ships, growth, leadership and peak performance. As an educator, he takes complex topics and concentrates the learnings into simple, empowering messages to generate instant improvement and lasting change in the lives of his students. His insightful programs stimulate, motivate and inspire his audiences.

Rik lives with his wife, Gai, and their three children in the pristine Dandenong Ranges in the outer east of Melbourne.

If you are looking for a powerful keynote presenter, conference emcee/host, workshop facilitator, retreat leader or coach, connect with Rik at insightpd.com.au.

It’s easy to trace the steps to this book coming to life, but it’s much harder to acknowledge everybody that played a part in this journey. While the book took only a few months to write, it is based on many decades of connecting with others and gaining the real life experiences that are documented within these pages.

This was a project on my mental ‘to do list’ for more than twenty years but it was a twenty-minute conversation at a conference I was hosting in Hamilton Island, where it finally crystalised. Thank you to Matt Church for providing the missing piece of the puzzle, S.A.M. I AM, I still have the coaster you wrote that diagram on. From that moment, my business manager, Katie, ensured I kept the writing coming and challenged me to get the daily word count to her, as well as providing support and encouragement throughout the whole process.

Once the manuscript was completed, I sent a copy to my friend and celebrated UK author Paul McGee for his review. Two weeks later he contacted me to ask if I had actually written the book personally or if it had been written for me professionally. I took it from that curious line of questioning that it had surprised him in a positive way; a point he clarifies in his foreword. Without Paul’s connection to this project, I doubt it would have gone much further, but his introduction to Wiley Australia proved the vital piece to this publishing puzzle.

I have been so fortunate to connect and collaborate with the creative team at Wiley. Thank you to Lucy Raymond for challenging me to take a good book and make it a great read! Thanks to Jem Bates, Ingrid Bond and Chris Shorten for tightening up the words and putting the real polish on the book, and to Theo Vassili for his astute and valuable marketing ideas. I owe a debt of gratitude and have a deeper appreciation for the power of publishing from working with this outstanding group.

So that’s the short-term acknowledgements, but this book has its long-term roots dating back to my primary school years. I actually liked writing short stories and never struggled to find topics to pen! The disruption to our family unit back then and my journey through that painful time gave me more than enough inspiration and motivation to document the lessons learned today. To that end I have to thank my big brother for ‘taking me in’ after our mother re-married, and practically raising me and continuing to educate me on the important disciplines of life, with none more important than to always say please and thank you.

My brother was my hero growing up and in many ways he still is today, and together with Geoff Everett, I had the two most important male role models in my life at a time when I needed them the most. At this time, I also met my best friend Louis, who is my ‘other brother’. He has always been one of my biggest cheerleaders, in partnership with my brother and Geoff. Whether that be professionally or personally, these three men know exactly what to say and do and exactly when to say and do it. I love our weekly chats and laughter.

My ‘workplace’ changed significantly in 1993 when I was asked to share my success strategies with our company’s wider sales team. I prepared for these talks knowing I had only three years of experience while many of the professionals I was presenting to boasted three decades. That day started my professional speaking career and has allowed me to connect with like-minded professionals throughout Australasia and globally. Thank you to all of my professional connections, fellow business owners, trainers, speakers, collaborators and students that have made up my audiences over the journey, giving me the chance to share what I know, learn and do my most rewarding work!

To my mentors including my beautiful godmother Judy Parkinson, Pat Mulligan (‘nothing is more important than family’), Chris Bell, George Hateley, Tony Robbins,
Dr Denis Waitley, Dr Stephen Covey, David Knox, Bob Wolff, John McGrath and the late, great Jim Rohn, I wrote this book in part to honour you all and to continue to share your wisdom. For Jim Rohn in particular, he made me promise I would write at least one book when the time was right; knowing that would lead to follow up ones, and I hope Mr Rohn’s prediction of a book series comes to fruition. According to Jim, ‘The magic was that I wrote
5 books … the mystery was, why didn’t I write 25?’ He told me that sometimes the book and timing choose the author, and that was certainly the case for me.

Finally, I need to acknowledge the most important person in my life. This book accomplishment is no surprise to my beautiful wife, Gai, who tells me she knew I had a talent for writing from the very first letter I penned to her way back in the early 1980s. She has kept every note, card and letter I wrote to her. We have also written a pretty special story together in the wider journey of life. Her contributions to our story continue to shine at ‘our place’ with our three amazing kids, Lockey, Chris and Amelia. We could not love you three more and we are proud of the people you are and who you are becoming. I know there are more exciting chapters of love and laughter for us to write together. I will look forward to recording the magic moments that will happen at ‘our place’ in the years ahead. The very best is yet to come.

From the moment we take our first breath to the moment we die, we are in some way communicating with the world around us. For all the practice we get, though, not all of us are that good at it. Agreed?

But there are exceptions. You just happen to be reading a book written by one of those exceptions. Rik Rushton. He’s an expert on the subject of communication.

Now having been to a few karaoke bars, I realise knowing the words to a song doesn’t make you a great singer. Likewise, being an expert on your topic doesn’t make you a great communicator. But you can relax. Rik is both an expert and someone who has the ability to communicate his expertise in an eloquent, enlightening and engaging way.

When Rik sent over the manuscript and asked me to write the foreword, I was honoured. I’ll be honest with you though, I was also extremely busy. So I decided I would read most of the book and simply scan the rest.

But I didn’t. I read it all. Every single word. You see, that’s Rik’s skill. Through his storytelling and his easy and accessible writing style he draws you into the subject.

As you’ll discover, some of Rik’s insights are not only profound, but also deeply personal. Trust me, if you don’t know Rik when you start reading the book, you’ll feel like you do by the time you finish.

Now, I’m fortunate. I know Rik both as a colleague and a friend. We’ve spoken at conferences together. I know his family. I’ve stayed at his home. I’ve even bonded with his dogs, Ted and Ferris! So can I let you in on a secret? He walks his talk. What you see is what you get. On stage or off, you’ll meet the same man. And that’s important to know. The insights and wisdom you’ll gain from reading this book are born of character and experience — they’re not just a bunch of untried or unproven ideas and techniques. Believe me, this guy practises what he preaches.

What’s really exciting is that the ideas in this book have the potential to change lives. They have the power to change the quality of your relationships both in and outside the workplace. That means with your children, your partner, your family, your neighbours, as well as your colleagues and clients. But first you have to do something with what you learn here.

Rik has played his part in helping you on your journey. Now it’s up to you. I dare you to take action on just one of the ideas you discover in the pages that follow. Trust me, it will make a positive difference on your road to success — whatever success looks like to you.

I sincerely hope you gain as much from reading this book as I did. Enjoy!

Paul McGee — The SUMO Guy
www.theSUMOguy.com

It is not what you do that determines the outcomes in your life. It’s who you are. Because ultimately, who you are determines what you do. If you’re a giver in the game of life, your actions confirm this. If you’re a taker, the same rule applies. If you enter relationships with others to see what you can take from that relationship, your actions reveal this. If you’re someone who makes a connection thinking only about what you can give to the relationship, you’re one of those rare individuals who gains everything from the exchange.

Connection is the keyword here. As human beings, our connections, or relationships, are formed through our ability to communicate. The quality of our life is therefore directly linked to the quality of our relationships. And we need to know how to communicate better if we are to form deeper connections with others, as well as with ourselves.

Communication is one of the most puzzling paradoxes of our time. We live in a hyper-connected world: more plugged in, tuned in and turned on than ever before. Yet social scientists confirm that more and more people feel isolated and disconnected from their communities and even their own families. They feel overworked, underpaid, misunderstood, isolated. Despite being ‘in touch’ 24/7, many people feel disengaged and disillusioned.

This book offers a roadmap for leaders who want to harness the power of communication to influence their teams and clients, for parents who seek better relationships with their kids, and for everyone who desires deeper and more fulfilling connections with those around them.

Business leaders know all about the struggle to engage and empower a workforce that clocks in then checks out (I call this the workplace challenge). How we think as individuals determines how we feel and communicate through our personal self-talk (this is the head space challenge). Finally, parents know the challenges of connecting with teenagers who text better than they talk (this is an example of the your place challenge). This book delivers proactive solutions to enhanced communication in each of these three critical domains — solutions that are as vital for business leaders as for parents or those seeking closer, more loving relationships.

The Power of Connection presents a fresh approach to tackling modern communication challenges, written for today’s time-poor reader, easily consumed in one sitting (one flight) or one night! It takes a holistic approach to professional and personal communication that will be a significant support in your ‘workplace’, your ‘head space’ and ‘your place’.

Improving our communication skills is a fast track to success in every area of our lives. We can improve our mindset through positive self-talk. The most important relationship you’ll ever have is your connection with you! The way you describe yourself in those conversations you have with the little voice inside your head thousands of times a day determines how you relate to and act in the outside world. Deeper connections with those close to you — family, friends, work colleagues, pets, pet rocks if that’s the extent of your social group — are formed through your quality communications, first with yourself and then with others. Communication is an inside out job.

My aim in writing this book is to provide you with communication tools that will improve every area of your life, as they have mine. This is not just about the words you use, which are only one aspect of your communication. Non-verbal communication is just as important. An exploration of the Power of Connection should begin with an understanding of the first key point:

It has been my experience that people engage less with your words than with your energy in delivering them. It’s your personal vibe that attracts your tribe.

When I meet someone for the first time, I find myself automatically assessing their energy: do they come across as positive, negative or neutral? I can then quickly ‘join the dots’ from their daily habits. How they think determines how they feel, which determines how they express their thoughts and feelings through the words and actions of their daily communication.

Author Will Durant summed up one of Aristotle’s teachings as, ‘We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.’ It is perhaps not surprising that an ancient Greek philosopher whose name can be translated as ‘the best purpose’ should provide us with such a timeless definition of habit, passed down through the ages for almost 2500 years. It is the cumulative effect of our daily actions that form these habits. As my mentor Jim Rohn so regularly told me, ‘Success is a few small disciplines repeated every day.’

The people I know — those I am lucky enough to associate with and mentor, and those I am even more fortunate to have as personal mentors and friends — share a similar glow. Under the law of attraction, like attracts like. If you are seeking greater success in your life, you need to find ways to improve your verbal and non-verbal communication skills to attract more like-minded people.

Success, in every realm of your life, is not a solo performance; it comes from engaging with other people, and it’s no surprise that those with superior communication skills achieve higher levels of success.

Connection is a pillar that supports every successful person and pursuit I have ever researched in my life! There are no successful hermits.

It is important to acknowledge that when I talk of success, I’m talking about much more than financial prosperity. I have the great good fortune to coach many individuals who by any standard would be considered financially independent. Yet many of them are unhappy; they feel unfulfilled and wonder whether there isn’t more to life. They can buy anything they want, except a day off (given they are workaholics), a loving relationship and/or magic with their children.

I know other people who live on Struggle Street, challenged economically on a daily basis, living from week to week, forced to rely on others’ support. Yet these same individuals often have strong relationships with their children and are raising polite, passionate and respectful kids, teaching them strong values that will stand them in good stead in the game of life.

Of these two groups, who is the more successful? Is it the person who has unlocked the code to financial success, or is it the person who has unlocked the code to developing a special relationship with their family? Of course it depends on what each person values most. Our wealthy individual may acknowledge that money isn’t everything, yet for them it’s right up there with oxygen. Our parenting genius may declare, ‘No amount of money can replace the relationship I have with my children, and by that measure I have wealth beyond counting.’ It’s hard to argue against either of these positions.

We all know that there are many pieces to the puzzle of life. All the money in the world cannot buy back your good health, nor can it improve your mindset — on its own. Yet it is important to acknowledge that while money can’t buy everything, it can provide you with valuable resources and choices in the pursuit of success.

For me, ultimate success is achieved when what you do on a daily basis meets your highest values. I am passionate about holistic success. And I want to convince you that you can have it all, improving all areas of your life — starting with your ability to communicate.

I must admit to writing this book for purely selfish reasons. Not the obvious ones you might think of, such as wanting to be a published author or to position myself as a platform speaker. I’ve written enough articles as a coach to satisfy the ‘author’ bug, and have spoken before conference crowds and audiences of thousands since 1995, so I have long since fulfilled that need.

More importantly, I am writing to educate our grand­children (who are yet to be born) in the same way my wife and I would like to think we have taught our three children around the principles of quality communication. In time, we fully expect to become the ‘funky grandparents’ we always imagined we would be, and I want to document these ideas while I have the time to prepare for this ultimate role.

Our grandchildren will be born into a very different world, and we see our role as grandparents as to ensure they have the skills to communicate effectively in the exciting, fast-paced world they will inherit. We will share with them that raw personal moment you will read about from the very first words of chapter 1. They will learn why, next to love and security, communication is the most vital pillar to successful family and work relationships.

If nothing else, this book will be a lasting reminder for my family, and hopefully for yours, of the power of quality communication. My hope is that from reading the stories they, and you, will learn more about how developing better communication and connection skills leads to a better quality of life.

Quality communication is a lifetime study. Let’s now explore together the small improvements that can make the biggest difference in your life through improving your ability to communicate.