Welcome to the weird and wonderful world of Julian Henby. For some time now, Julian, the Bridget Jones of letter writing, has been badgering decent, hard-working celebrities with a barrage of frankly absurd correspondence, often relating to his dysfunctional family and pets. Dear Celebrity is a compilation of some of his finest work and includes many of the best celebrity responses. So, can Matthew Kelly find Henby's mother a job as a Bearded Lady? Will Professor Lord Robert Winston be able to do anything to help Julian's hamster, David, whose locomotion is severely impaired by his erection which drags along the floor like a fifth leg? Will Joanna Lumley find the time to visit Julian's elderly uncle to talk about her career? And why does Sir Jimmy Savile insist on being the Loch Ness monster? The answers to these and many more questions are to be found here...
Jimmy Savile. Damien Hirst. Huw Edwards. Michael Jackson. Des O'Connor. Rod Steward. Brian Blessed. Robert Winston. Nick Baker. Patrick Moore. Noel Edmonds. Michael Flatley. Sophie Ellis-Bextor. Private Bill Office. Hugh Grant. George W Bush. Bill Oddie. Richard Briars. David Bellamy. Uri Geller. John Major. Barry McGuigan. Carol Vorderman. Tom Baker. Frank Carson. Jeremy Clarkson. Nicholas Parsons. Des Lynam. Kate Winslet. Margaret Thatcher. Gary Linekar. JK Rowling. Joe Pasquale. James Herbert. Anthony Hopkins. Beefeater. Paul McCartney. Peter Duncan. June Brown. Brian Connolly. Michael Buerk. Ian Hislop. Gareth Gates. Steve Redgrave. Jools Holland. Michael Fish. Matthew Kelly. Sylvester McCoy. Nick Ross. Tara P-T. Cliff Richard. Paul McKenna. Emma Thompson. Victoria Wood. Nigel Havers. Paul McKenna. Edwina Currie. Phillip Schofield. Richard Stilgoe. Alan Davies. Anneka Rice. Keith Chegwin. Adam Hart-Davis. Joanna Lumley. Brian May. Richard Wilson. Lulu. Elvis Presley. About the author.
The letters in this book are so absurd the at the author could not bring himself to sign them with his won name. In fact, Henby is a pseudonym of Julian Henley. In real life, Julian Henley (the man behind Henby) graduated from the University of Brighton with a Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling and is now a highly qualified humanistic counsellor. He has worked with clients from all walks of life but initially specialised in counselling people with drug and alcohol addictions. Julian has cerebral palsy and is seriously considering getting his wheelchair turbo-charged to outrun any disgruntled celebrities....
To Mr James Herbert, London. My mother insists that your books are the work of Satan. the other day I tried to smuggle in one of your novels. After incinerating the book, Mother scrubbed my skin with a wire brush to cleanse me of evil. There is only one way to convince Mother that your books are harmless: she will have to meet you! Please let me know when you could come and see Mother. We really do need to get all of this sorted out... There is one constant in Julian Henby's life: his obsession with famous people. To him they are the elite of society and if anyone can help him and his family muddle through their chaotic life, they can... Can Matthew Kelly find Henby's mother a job as a Bearded Lady? Will Joanna Lumley find the time to visit Julian's elderly uncle to talk about her career? And why does Sir Jimmy Savile insist on being the Loch Ness monster? The answers to these and many more questions are to be found here... "Side-splitting" —Ben Dover "You'll wet yourself laughing" —I. P. Freely "Couldn't put it down" —Paige Turner
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